Tony Bennett sings I left my brain on a shelf in Tesco

a) to make every effort to ensure that Kate and Gerry McCann are prosecuted for their admitted abandoning of their children six nights in a row in Praia da Luz
b) to change the law in whatever way is needed in order to send out a clear message to all parents that leaving young children on their own is never acceptable, and to strive for the adoption of a ‘Madeleine’s Law’ with its key message: “Never leave young children on their own”
c) to pursue – in conjunction with others – the truth about Madeleine McCann’s disappearance on 3 May 2007, and in particular to encourage Kate and Gerry McCann and the friends who were with them in Praia da Luz to tell the truth about Madeleine’s disappearance
d) to investigate the facts behind the extent of British government involvement in this case and the reasons for it
e) to ensure that the media, in particular the British media, report this case accurately and give due weight to the opinions of so many of the general public that the McCanns are withholding the truth about Madeleine’s disappearance
f) to demand a full-scale investigation by the relevant authorities into the activities of the Find Madeleine Fund private trust and to encourage the trustees of that fund to give full particulars about its income and expenditure to the public who have donated so generously to it with the express purpose of finding Madeleine
g) to generally promote the welfare of children, in particular by ensuring that parents are aware of the psychological needs of their children and ensuring that the relevant authorities take appropriate action to safeguard and promote the welfare of children.

Members will be invited to take part in all decision-making and will receive regular information about what the Madeleine Foundation is doing.

Please be patient if we feel the need to ask you one or two questions before accepting you into membership.

The Madeleine Foundation is only for those committed to achieving our above aims.

The disappearance of Madeleine McCann is both highly controversial and highly emotive. People have taken sides. Very strong words have been said on both sides. Poor Madeleine McCann has thus proved to be a divisive figure. For the McCanns and those who support them, the stakes are high.

The case of the disappearance of Madeleine McCann has many parallels with other cases where families have cried ‘abduction’ when their infant child has gone missing – only for us all to find out later that the child has died at the hands of the parents, whether accidentally, negligently or intentionally.

In such circumstances it is very possible that there may be people who wish to sign up to The Madeleine Foundation who are not in sympathy with our aims at all.

We await developments in Portugal and Leicestershire where two separate police forces are sitting on thousands of pages of evidence, in relation to an unexplained disappearance and possible homicide.

One thing is certain. There is precious little evidence of an abduction.

If no charges are brought against the McCanns, an Inquest must be held

Should the Portuguese police fail to bring any charges against Kate and Gerry McCann arising out of the circumstances surrounding the ‘disappearance’ of Madeleine McCann, it is the settled intention of the Madeleine Foundation to ask the relevant authorities, whether in Portugal or England, to hold an Inquest.

Inquests are routinely held on missing persons. Most will recall, for example, the Inquest held on the missing canoeist, who later turned up in Panama.

In the absence of a prosecution of the McCanns, an Inquest is the best method that would then be available of getting to the truth about how Madeleine McCann went missing. And it would enable the many witnesses who have remained silent until now to say in open court what they know about the events from 28 April to 4 May in Praia da Luz

If this isn’t satire it ought to be. Haven’t you thought of being a stand up comedian Anthony Bennett?

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